The Star Trek Fuck Report

I'm going to let you in on a little secret: for all my claims of how scientific this study is I have done very little in the way of actual research into any of the things I'm writing about. Of course I'm watching the episodes in question but beyond that? I might look at Wikipedia or IMDB to get the date the episode aired or to check what I know a particular character actor who pops up as a guest star in a given episode from but other than that? Nothing. I mean I have random one off characters whose names I've just spelled out phonetically because I can't even be bothered to look up how they're actually spelled. That's the level of hard hitting research I'm willing to engage in. Occasionally I've come across little bits of trivia in the aforementioned Wikipedia articles or IMDB entries that are interesting that I've mentioned in my write-ups, but by and large I've never really gotten into the behind the scenes stuff about Star Trek: T...

With the second season of Star Trek: The Next Generation behind us we're going to take another look at a bit of ephemera that would have existed concurrently with the second episode, specifically the series finale of the television sitcom, Webster. For those of you unfamiliar with it Webster was "an American sitcom television series that aired on ABC from September 16, 1983 to May 8, 1987 and in first-run syndication from September 21, 1987 to March 10, 1989." [ 1 ] The show stared Emmanuel Lewis "as a young boy who, after losing his parents, is adopted by his NFL-pro godfather, portrayed by Alex Karras, and his new socialite wife, played by Susan Clark." A less generous and more succinct description of the show would be that it was a Diff'rent Strokes knockoff designed to cash-in on that show's success. Why am I talking about Webster today? Because oddly enough it crossed over with the Star Trek: The Next Generation in an episode titled Web...

So it's come to this...a Star Trek: The Next Generation clip show. First airing on July 17, 1989, Shades of Gray is routinely held up as the worst Star Trek: The Next Generation of all time. Wikipedia says of it, "The episode was intended to save money at the end of the season by being a bottle episode which featured few additional characters," and explains that the reason the episode came into being was due to the fact that, "the show had overspent on the episodes 'Elementary, Dear Data' and 'Q Who,' and Paramount Pictures was holding the series to their overall season budget." So reviled is this particular episode that even the head writer of it, Maurice Hurley referred to it as, "a piece of shit," and called it, "terrible, just terrible." So it looks like I've got a lot to look forward to. Preexisting Prejudices This is a bad episode of Star Trek and was always a disappointment when it showed up as one of the...

We're coming down the homestretch of season 2 of Star Trek: The Next Generation here at the Star Trek Fuck Report as we look at the 21st episode, Peak Performance. The last couple episodes have been pretty horny so here's hoping the trend continues with this here episode. Preexisting Prejudices The little episode summary on Netflix informs me that this episode is about a war games exercise that ends up getting interrupted by some Ferengi. Fuck...this is going to suck. Plot Synopsis We kick things off with Picard dropping a Captain's Log informing us that he's agreed to Starfleet's request to divert to some random-ass system to take part in a war game and they will be joined by Zack Dorn, a master strategist, as an observer and mediator. We then see Zack Dorn, a short round alien guy, as he and Riker With Beard stride across the bridge and enter the conference room where Picard is waiting to meet them. Picard welcomes him and asks if he would like ...

We're coming down the home stretch on Season 2 of Star Trek: The Next Generation here at the Star Trek Fuck Report and today we check in with the antepenultimate episode, "The Emissary," which first aired on June 29, 1989. The title and the brief episode summary on Netflix lead me to believe it's about a emissary but beyond that who knows. Preexisting Prejudices Before beginning this entire deal I think I knew like maybe five Star Trek: The Next Generation episodes by name though there are many, many more that I could identify by a brief plot summary which is generally how I know which episode I'm about to watch. This go-round the plot summary is so vague that for a minute I thought I was somehow rewatching the episode where a horny Troi's mom boards the Enterprise since it was just like, "An emissary boards the Enterprise and some shit happens." That's like the plot of probably 65% of all Star Trek: The Next Generation episodes. All of ...